Rescue Mission (An Asylum Interlude)

A wave thundered against the prow of the boat, pitching the small craft upwards and throwing Badger to the deck. To steady herself, she clutched at the nearest thing she could find. However, her fellow gnome, Mallet, was not secured and together they tumbled across the floor as the sea bounced and jostled beneath the boat.

The gnomes rolled around wildly. Mallet appeared to be made of nothing but knees and elbows. Another wave crashed into the side of the boat, sending it into a sickening roll. The heartless water of the Gulf of Bothnia beckoned and Badger knew there was nothing she could do to stop them falling overboard.

The third crew member caught them in time, his rough hands pinning them to the wet floor. Badger blinked sea spray from her eyes and looked at the towering monstrosity above her. At just over four feet tall, the hobgoblin was more than twice her height.

‘Thank you, Rasp,’ she said.

‘Yeah,’ Rasp replied.

The boat fell into a trough between waves, rightening itself.

Badger sprang to her feet. ‘We have to get to shore,’ she cried, pointing. The welcoming beach lay only forty feet away

Without a pause, Rasp leapt into the sea, his cry of ‘Yeah’ gargling as he hit the water. He broke the surface a moment later, grabbed the tow line and swam for the shore. The boat juddered as it was dragged along, cutting through waves which threatened to capsize it.

When Rasp reached the sand, the gnomes jumped from the boat and the three of them hurried towards a nearby cave. Though it was only early afternoon, night was coming. This close to the Arctic Circle, there was daylight for only three hours of the day. Looking to the west, Badger relished the light of the sunset on her face before entering the grotto.

‘We’re on the right track,’ Mallet said. His hand raised to a wall, fingers tracing the symbols that had been marked. ‘Kamron’s sigil. His party came this way.’

‘But never came back.’ Badger didn’t need to voice the multitude of questions behind the statement. They both knew there were many reasons that Kamron’s expedition into Finland may not have returned – none of them good. ‘We press on, regardless.’

‘Yeah,’ Rasp added though his voice wavered. Unfortunately, his grasp of the gnome language had not advanced beyond the one word.

They moved deeper into the cave. Being creatures that spent the majority of their lives underground, their eyes were keen in the darkness and all made their way over the uneven ground with ease. After thirty or so feet, the cave narrowed, the close walls forcing them to walk in single file. In some places, Rasp had to turn sideways to pass through.

The naturally made passage twisted left then right, right again and began to rise. The incline grew steadily steeper until they were more climbing than walking. As they scrambled upwards, moonlight silvered the rockface and the scent of night air descended to them. In less than an hour, they were once more out in the open.

Three tiny heads peered out at the snowy vista. A sheet of pristine white covered the ground before them, leading down to a copse of trees seventy yards away. Beyond the trees, the land rose and afforded them the glimpse of – in the distance – hundreds of lights twinkling red, green, yellow, blue.

‘What form of witchery is that?’ Mallet asked.

‘We will find out when we get there,’ Badger said. ‘No doubt Kamron and the others would have seen it and made their way there. Let’s go.’

She stepped forward on the snowfield, her small frame barely leaving an impression. Mallet was equally light but Rasp’s feet crunched the snow and left a trail of footprints.

They were halfway to the copse when Rasp stopped and sniffed the air. He looked behind them and uttered a hoarse, ‘Yeah.’

Badger turned. Her heart picked up a beat.

Behind the hole from which they had emerged stood five huge beasts. Four-legged, taller even than Rasp, hot breath billowing before them. White fur covered their legs and bodies and would have made it difficult to spot them against the backdrop of snow. But the horrible protuberances which sprouted from their heads were impossible to miss; twisted, branch-like growths which reached for the sky, higher than Badger could stretch.

The monsters stood still, glaring at the gnomes and the hobgoblin and speaking to one another in unearthly grunts. One of them dipped its neck and shook its head. Snow drifted from its disfigured crown.

Badger was afraid to breathe.

The lead creature lifted its head again, its nostrils flexing as it inhaled their scent. It issued a harsh bleat then took a step forward. And another.

Rasp wasted no time. He shouted his usual, ‘Yeah!’ and neither Badger nor Mallet were in doubt to his meaning. The three of them bolted for the treeline as fast as they could, not daring to look back to see if the creature was gaining on them.

Badger burst into the forest, head light, lungs heavy, and did not stop running until she collided with something which yelped with fright.

‘Getofoffme!’ The call was shrill like that of a scared child.

‘Grimbol,’ Mallet cried.

Badger gasped when she saw who she had run into – an adult gnome, one of Kamron’s men. Surely he could explain what had happened to the rest of the party.

‘Mallet, thank goodness you’re here,’ Grimbol said before Badger could speak. His words were hurried and his eyes wide. ‘You have to get me away from here but we can’t get past the reindeer.’ He pointed at the lumbering beasts that had chased them into the trees. To Badger’s relief, none of them showed any inclination of entering the forest.

‘We will all get out of here,’ Badger soothed. ‘Just as soon as we find Kamron and the others.’

Grimbol shook his head furiously. ‘No. We must go now, before…’ He clamped a hand over his mouth, his eyes showing more sclera. Even in the darkness under the trees, the colour visibly drained from his face.

‘What is it, Grimbol?’ Mallet spat. ‘Tell us now.’

The gnome raised an arm and pointed a shaking finger in the direction of the twinkling lights.

‘Is that where Kamron is?’ Badger asked.

Dread transformed Grimbol’s face into a vicious mask and he nodded. ‘Yes,’ he croaked. ‘He was…’

‘Go on,’ coaxed Badger.

‘He was eaten by the oho giant.’

*

When pressed for more information about the terrifying giant, Grimbol clammed up. He backed away until he came up against a tree, then slid down and hid his face behind his knees. Muffled sobs were the only sound he made.

Badger charged Mallet with staying with Grimbol – to protect himself from himself, she said – while she and Rasp investigated the lights in the hopes of finding Kamron. Though Mallet voiced his reluctance to stay with the gibbering gnome, he acquiesced; they both knew that Rasp was incapable of calming Grimbol down should it be required.

Not wanting to delay Kamron’s rescue further, Badger led Rasp deeper into the forest towards the mysterious lights. Although the trees grew in random clumps, forcing them to take a circuitous route, they followed the downward slope and made swift progress. At the far edge of the forest, they stopped and surveyed the land before them.

Across the undisturbed snow, hundreds of small houses stood in no apparent order. Though the scattering suggested a lack of planning, every home was sturdily built. More than that, Badger realised. Each was crafted with a dainty care, from the ornate doorknockers to the brightly painted window-boxes. The eaves glittered with multicoloured lights; random flashes of reds and blues, greens and yellows.

‘Have you ever seen such sorcery?’ Badger said in awed tones.

‘Yeah,’ Rasp said, shaking his head.

Most of the buildings that sprawled haphazardly were small, too small for a gnome to enter at full height, but at the centre of the village lay two much larger constructions. The nearest was three storeys high and around two hundred feet in length. Decorative windows gleamed with light and a cacophony of voices emanated from within. No words could be discerned but there was melody in the timbre and pitch.

‘It’s too big to be a tavern.’

‘Yeah.’

The last building was monstrous in comparison to its neighbours. It towered over the rest of the village, some five or six times higher than the unknown Hall. Yet it was clear that this was not a many-levelled castle intended for use by the villagers. The huge portal proved that the whole structure was the same design as the other homes, but on a much larger scale. Badger’s throat went dry when she considered the size of the creature that lived there. This must be the lair of the oho giant.

Despite the ice that descended her spine, she refused to believe that Kamron and his men had been eaten. Until she saw their fate with her own eyes, she would not stop until their rescue had been secured.

She formulated a plan and told Rasp.

‘First, we get to that…’ Not knowing what to call it, she pointed that the unknown building from which the voices came. ‘We take stock of the nature and number of our foe. If we can’t defeat them, we find a way to lock them in. Then we break into the giant’s home and look for the missing gnomes.’

‘Yeah,’ he replied in the tone of one pleading to be excused.

As one, they ran for the nearest building. It was tall enough for Badger to hide behind but Rasp had to hunch to remain hidden. Apart from the lights hanging from the roof, the house was dark and quiet. No signs of life.

They moved to the next house and the next, creeping through the village in this stealthy manner. They passed little picket fences, tiny vegetable and herb gardens, petite bicycles and tandems propped against walls; but no indication of who – or what – lived in the homes.

As they drew closer to the main building, it became clear that the noise inside was myriad voices joined in song. Badger could still not determine the words, but the overall effect lifted her heart. For no reason at all, a sense of peace washed over her. She smiled and rushed closer to peer through the windows.

Inside, dozens of tiny, green-skinned humanoids whizzed around, moving various items from one place to another. More sat at desks, assembling the assorted pieces, while others constructed the finished products which were then placed on conveyor belts leading to the basement. All were singing cheerfully, clearly content in their work.

‘What are they?’ Badger asked. ‘Pixies?’

Rasp shook his head.

‘Brownies?’

Another no.

‘Elves?’

‘Yeah.’

At the sound of his voice, an elf close to the window turned around. Upon seeing the hobgoblin, the elf’s eyes widened, its jaw dropped and it stopped singing. Nearby elves, confused by their brethren’s behaviour, looked first at the quiet elf, followed its gaze to Rasp then they too ceased their noise. The circle of silence expanded throughout the area until not a sound was issued.

The stillness pressed down on Badger, chasing away the serenity she had felt. Had it been witchcraft, a spell cast on her to lull her into a false sense of security? Had Rasp once again saved her life?

She did not have time to answer. In the unnatural quiet, the creak of an opening door was like thunder. The sound came from behind her. From the giant’s lair.

Against her will, her head turned and she saw the fell beast.

Silhouetted in the massive doorway, the figure was larger than anything she had ever seen. The oho giant must have been alerted by the sudden quietening of the elves’ song. The obese body could barely pass through the opening yet out he strode, issuing the one sound for which he was named.

‘Ho!’

As he stepped into the moonlight, his horrific garb became all too clear to see. From his cap to his feet, the giant was dressed in fabric the colour of blood. The only clothing of a different shade were his night-black boots and belt, a belt which strained against his bulging stomach. It was all too easy to imagine the belly was distorted due to the recent consumption of multiple gnomes.

‘Ho,’ he repeated as he drew nearer.

Badger wanted to flee but she knew she would never outrun the beast’s monstrous stride. With each footfall, the ground shook and it was all she could do to stay upright. Unless she thought of something quickly, she was going to join Kamron in his fate.

The giant leaned over, lowering his head to Badger. Behind his shaggy beard, his mouth opened and showered her with cinnamon-scented breath.

‘Ho. What have we here?’ the oho giant boomed. ‘Another gnome, and a hobgoblin? Well, there’s always room for more.’ He stood up, placing his hands on his belly and laughing in three short bursts.

Badger quivered. Her mind refused to work, to offer an escape from the predicament. She was destined to become this monster’s dessert.

‘Badger? Is that you?’

A familiar voice cut through the tension. Badger cast a glance at the giant’s front door. Beyond the threshold were several gnomes – Kamron and his group.

‘What are you doing here?’ Kamron added.

Badger switched her gaze to the oho giant. The smile on his face hadn’t altered, but it now seemed less threatening.

‘Come on in,’ he said, gesturing to his home. ‘There’s always room for more guests at Santa’s house.’